Saturday, July 18, 2015

The Marriage Trauma!

Everyone says “It’s time to marry” once we get to our 20's but do we feel ?!

So yeah as a country we are obsessed with celebrating  weddings with unnecessary extravagenzas and also a vast number of parents still consider marrying off their children to be a major responsibility *I mean it is ,but they soleley consider it their big to do task *.So what if the girl / boy is not ready to get married? Or does not feel responsible enough for that giant leap ?

For example , as someone who hasn't dreamt of their marriage since high school .To me marriage is still very alien and something I am not ready for *I doubt if I will ever be ready though!*. So with these conversations around me , followed by cribbing about the same dreaded marriage from my friends made me think why is this such  a big thing ! After all our parents have their own reasons for it and we have our own to stay away from it.

                  It should have been- Not sure if Marriage would suck for me or I would suck at marriage!

So, I set about my research and came across reports and columns in which even parents with such liberal and urbane outlook become awry when it comes to their kid’s marriage. So here's a list of few reasons why in general most girls who are 23 years old and above get hounded *Sorry men, nothing against you but generally most guys I know don't get pressured until they are 27* :

Reason #1: Everything starts with the visit to the astrologer *He who knows everything, supposedly!*.Then by a freak coincidence the stars and planets have to spell out ‘MARRIAGE’ which should happen within the next year or so. *Bam! Do you hear my world crashing!*.I really can't understand the undue importance Indian households give for astrology, roughly 4 billion people in the world seem to get by without planets, stars and astrologers showing them the way!


Reason #2: The new matchmakers of the 21st century, matrimonial websites. It is pretty much like an online marketplace for young Indians of “marriageable age” who apparently never smoke nor drink and is the epitome of the perfect bride/groom.In reality maybe they all are, but I just found it way too hard to believe. I was surprised at the variety and classifications I found there! Seriously, you can custom find your dream groom/bride- much like how you would get a Subway sandwich made :P .


Reason #3: Uncles, aunties and people I don't even know exist! She’s 23 when you are getting her married. What is your problem in life people? Don’t you have enough of worries yourself? Is marriage the only life mission of every girl? It’s as if, as soon as a girl turns 23 some psycho alarm starts ringing in their minds *These are times I wish Dexter was a real person*



Reason #4: Parents. It’s high time we stopped deciding “marriageable age” for men and women. We do not need to have a fixed checklist for life like this:
·         CBSE Board exams 90 %  -- Check
·         Engineer/ Doctor -  Check
·         Masters – Check
·         Job – Check
·         Marriage – Like really?! Why can't people just live their lives?!
·         Kids – uh just when I thought the list was all over!

                                         

People crib about marriage all the time , then why do you even want to force it on others? *sadistic people, I say!*.Marriage is such an expensive affair  and it is still considered a prestige issue in most communities. The children should be given the responsibility to fund their marriage and also to get married when they like *At least for those who want that freedom*!!


No offense to all my friends who are married, I wish you all a very happy married life and I am truly happy for you . While as for  those of you who are in a situation similar to mine, welcome to the club :(  . And if any prospective grooms / groom’s parents have read this then I guess you understand it’s high time you stop pursuing me, please find a more willing and appropriate bride for your son *Though India’s gender ratio is distorted, we still have 940 women for every 1000 men*.

If you have any thoughts on this or if you completely disagree with me and feel every girl on earth should get married by the time they turn 23 *I will find you and torment you!* please feel free to express it.

I hope to be more regular and write more .Till my next post , take care and live life Carpe Diem ;)
Keep that beautiful smile on :)

P.S : And when you comment please leave your names, Anonymous comments will be removed *Being anonymous  does give us a lot of power but let's  just save that for Superheroes*


5 comments:

  1. Does this mean you've got "rishats" flowing in and photos of the "prospective grooms" lying all over your house:P

    Anyway, jokes apart, I love the use of memes and I think all the girls this age would agree.
    Also, marriage being an expensive affair is one of the reasons I am seriously considering Court marriage.
    I would want my parents to be happy and stress free and most importantly, I do not want to be a "financial burden" yet again.. and again..
    Good work!

    Next post : About kids :P

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    1. Hahaha thankfully I do not have "rishats" and pictures of " prospective grooms" lying around my house! Thank you so much for your feedback. Exactly most girls our age are cribbing about this and that's why I wrote this. Wohoo! Way to go girl! Court marriage is such an economical and viable option. All the money that would have been shelled out on marriage can be used to do much better things :) Thank you for reading man :)
      You want me to write about Kids :| ,I guess you fast forwarded a little too soon.

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  2. jinju......i can guess whatever talks happened between u & ur mom.......
    only thing is parents want to relieve from their duties...and safely settling down their kids(specially girls) is their primary target..
    else u can covince ur parents ...if u have high aims like civil service or like....BUT U MUST ACHIEVE IT.....then no one will question u.

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    1. Chechi! Actually this is not traumatic only for me but also for thousands of girls who belong to the same age group. I agree from parent's point of view it is more relaxing and like mission accomplished once their kids get married.But kids are not liabilities any more, especially when they are increasingly becoming independent.
      And finally thank you for the motivation, yes there is quite a lot of things I want to do in life and marriage isn't featuring in that list anytime soon :)

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  3. Wow great post! It's a phase Jojo...you'll get over it!!! ;P :D all the best! :)

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